Happiness Isn't Size Specific

I have struggled with my weight for a good part of my life. I started off as a skinny child, but once puberty hit I started noticing that I was gaining weight. I remember in high school, I always thought I was fat because there was always someone much smaller than I was. I had a small waist, but my hips, thighs, and butt were mostly bigger than other girls. People made fun of me for being more curvy than they were. For the first part of high school, I was living in Italy and I noticed that I didn't see many girls who looked like me. They didn't have the same body type or hair even. It probably didn't help that I was kind of different than most of the other girls as well. This caused many of the guys I had crushes on to not see me in a romantic light. Many of them thought I was a freak, a weird, nappy-haired, mixed freak. Those years in Italy really hurt my self-esteem so when I moved to South Carolina, it was strange when guys started to pay attention to me. I received more attention than I had those three years in Italy, but it didn't help my self-esteem because self-esteem is all about your inner self and feelings. I still didn't believe that I was worthy of a guys attention because the negativity from Italy was still trapped in my heart. I tried to lose weight so that I would hopefully be able to see myself as someone beautiful, but it was a struggle.

College was the time that I had finally come to a realization that I was beautiful even though I had curves. I felt comfortable in my own skin at that moment in my life because college changes you. It helps you deal with your problems and step out of your comfort zones. College helped me to notice that I had always been beautiful in my life, and that I should love my extra curves because I was still a healthy weight. I had finally embraced my body so I know that other people who struggle with their weight can embrace themselves too. If you are a healthy weight for your height, but the weight goes to places that maybe you don't want it to be then find ways to tone and tighten. If you are overweight and are trying to drop weight to help with your self-esteem and health then maybe have someone to help motivate you at first. I gained more weight when I started living with my boyfriend, and now I'm back to feeling bad about the way I look, but I am changing that. I have started making changes to my diet which is always the first step, and I am going to get a personal trainer to help motivate me when I go to the gym. You don't have to be alone when starting the journey of weightloss. I'm sure that there are people in your life who would gladly join you because they may want to lose some weight too. Losing weight is difficult at first, but it doesn't have to be a chore.

"When you accept yourself, the whole world accepts you too."

#weightloss #selfesteem